The Parents Role In Junior Golf & Sport

 Parents in Golf

I love watching my son and daughter play their respective sports. There’s something special about seeing them pursue their passions, practice, and compete. Sports teach valuable life lessons—dedication, resilience, and perseverance. In many ways, sports are a microcosm of life itself. An athlete can dedicate weeks, months, or even years to a major event, only to come up short when it matters most.

From the sidelines, I often hear parents shouting instructions to their kids on the football pitch. What’s interesting is that young children don’t fully understand the game like we do; they’re still learning. Watching them play can be like watching a swarm of bees—pure chaos at times Now remember they have young minds, they don't understand sports like we do so we shouldn't expect them to be dialing into Pep Guardiola's tactics. More often than not, they won’t recognize exactly what’s being said, but they will pick up on the tone of voice. That’s why it’s so important to allow coaches to do their job. Parents should take a step back, watch with a calm and measured approach, and simply enjoy the experience. Encouragement is great—cheers and claps are welcome—but if you find yourself shouting instructions until you're red in the face, your child may start to associate playing sports with making you unhappy. Over time, their self-worth may become tied to how well they perform. With golf being an individual sport I believe this to be magnified even more.

The Coaching Perspective

I was coaching a group of 15 kids the other day, aged between 7 and 10. After demonstrating and explaining what we’d be working on, I sent them down the range to practice. As I walked the line, I could hear parents offering instructions: “Keep your left arm straight! Keep your head down! Look at the ball! Stop moving your feet, aww what are you doing!” The list went on.

Now, imagine you’re a child who’s just starting out in golf. You love whacking the ball with a stick, you know how to hold the club, and you’re giving it your best shot. If you hit the ball well, your parent stays silent. But if you struggle, you get bombarded with advice. The message that starts to form in your mind is: When I hit the ball well, my parent is happy. When I don’t, they’re not. That’s a dangerous association for a young athlete.

The Power of Support: Jaymie’s Story

Let me tell you about one of my longtime junior students, Jaymie. When I first met her, she was eight years old and came to lessons with her sister. She always had a smile on her face—she just enjoyed hitting the ball. Her father, who brought them to lessons, was always positive and encouraging, never interfering in the coaching process. I liked them instantly.

At that time, Jaymie showed very little natural talent for golf. She wasn’t particularly athletic, and I remember how her lack of core strength caused her to swing over the top, producing huge slices. We worked hard on this, and while she improved, it remained a challenge for years. Some parents would have grown frustrated: Why isn’t my child progressing faster? Why hasn’t this issue been “fixed”? But Jaymie’s father took a long-term approach. He understood that excellence takes time—especially in golf.

Among the 150 junior golfers in the program, Jaymie would never have stood out as a natural talent. But what she did have was an incredible attitude. She worked relentlessly, committed to improving little steps every day. In the eight years I coached her, I never once saw her father criticize her swing or pressure her about performance. He supported her in the right way—by allowing her to develop at her own pace.

Years later, Jaymie went on to represent her country, won 2 National Championships and now plays NCAA Division 1 college golf in Michigan. 

If you are interested, click on the link to see Jaymie's swing progress from 2017 - 2023, :-

The Car Ride Home

This moment can feel awkward. Your child might be upset about their performance—maybe they double-bogeyed the last hole and are frustrated. Now is not the time to dissect the round shot by shot. Instead, stay calm and let them cool off in their own way. A simple offer like, "Want to grab your favorite drink on the way home?" can go a long way in shifting the mood.

Avoid bringing up the round until the next day when the dust has settled. Then, you can ask if they want to talk about it. This is your opportunity to reassure them that you’re proud of them—win or lose.

Now, if there’s a persistent issue, such as poor attitude or behavior, you have every right as a parent to address it. In these cases, involving the coach can be valuable. A good coach can help a young athlete recognize and correct bad habits, reinforcing the importance of sportsmanship and emotional control. Tackling these issues early will only help them in the long run.

The Bigger Picture

Whether it’s golf or another sport, supporting your child the right way is crucial. If they play well—great. But that shouldn’t make you more proud of them or love them more. Your reactions to their setbacks, failures, and victories shape their mindset and relationship with the game. Be mindful of that.

The best thing you can do as a parent? Encourage, support, and enjoy the ride. Let them fail. Let them struggle. Let them figure things out. And most importantly—let them have fun.